I'M MEHHY YOE,HEH,HEH,HEH,HEH,HEH, IFUCKIN'SCHTINK,HEH,HEH,HEH,HEH,HEH,
Thursday, May 11, 2006
Tuesday, May 09, 2006
INTERPOPE HOLIDAYS !
BOOK NOW,with your local "INTERPOPE" agent for a holiday of a lifetime. If you are really lucky you may well meet John Paul 2nd frolicking in the sea or sun bathing on a beautiful beach.
In our attached picture you can see the Holy Holiday maker sipping his favourite tipple of Rum, Meths and Orange punch despite having been buried in the sand for a bit of fun by a few of his "Jetset" freinds.
Politically correct ?
A fair percentage of my teeth are black, does this make me politically correct ?
POPE FORMS NEW BAND
Just when you thought it was safe to go back in your local record shop the ever popular Johnny Paul 2nd has launched a new band with a new album....MITREHEAD !
You can see the Papal rockers on their current U.K. tour at a venue near you.
TOUR DATES
June 1st BISHOPS GATE
June 3rd WALTHAM ABBEY
June 6th CHRISTCHURCH
June 10th OLDCHURCH
June 15th HORNCHURCH
June 18th BISHOP STORTFORD
June 21stABBOTTS WOOD
June 22nd CROCKSFORD
June 30th WOBURN ABBEY
All gigs feature special guest backing singer, CHARLOTTE CHURCH !
Monday, May 08, 2006
"Of all the bars in the world, you had to walk into this one"
"Ere, Cherie, any danger of you givin' me one of those cigar tab ends you got in yer breast pockets?""Those aren't cigars, silly!!"
Pope in hotel bill shocker
As the Pope checked out of his hotel after an extensive stay at the Waldorf in Copenhaagen, he was utterly shocked to be handed the bill for all the "extras".
Sunday, May 07, 2006
Saturday, May 06, 2006
IT'S THE ARTS.
Piotr Illych Tschaikovsky, was he the genius classical composer of such greats as "The Nutcracker suite" and "Swan Lake" who evolved out of an underpriviledged background in St. Petersburg to thrill the music world for almost two centuries or just some "Freewheeling old Poof" from 19th century Russia? The decision is all yours !
FALKLANDS STAR BACK.
Here we see the heroic J.P.2 returning from the Falklands war. Whilst there our brave avenger fought anybody or thing that he didn't like the look of.
However, his most notable achievement during the conflict was when he single handedly captured three sheep and turned a Goose Green !
His first words on his return were heard to be, "If any of those Argy bastards ever try to set foot in one of my bars again I'll gob in their drink and set fire to their pubic hair !"
The 180th Vatican Games.
A fine alround effort from the multi talented Pope John Paul 2nd climaxed on the rings at the Annual Vatican games last night. An absolutely flawless performance gave J.P.2 his 44th Gold medal. (The mess from the " climax" was soon cleaned up!)
Wednesday, May 03, 2006
FLIT ANGEL KILLER !
Gets rid of all those horrible nasty flying things in one fell swoop ! In most "Happy shoppers" now !
The Met'
Yes a copper really does get a saw head after a Notting Hill riot and his mate stands by contently snot gobbling.
Tuesday, May 02, 2006
It's a Bullseye !
Could this be the result of Genetic engineering, the Chernobyl fallout or simply just "Mad cow disease." You decide.
DRUNK AGAIN !
Pope John Paul 2nd crashed his car yesterday after downing six pints of " Creme de menthe" in the Ivy restaurant. When asked by the Police what he was up to he said, " Ten lagers, twenty gins, four whiskeys and twenty seven bitters." Owing to his celebrity status,the police let him go with a caution.
EEEILO EEEILO EEEILO, can I interest you in some nice little " Treacles" that I picked up downtown recently? They could all be yours if you would just confess to the jewellrey blag in Brompton Street last week which would make me look very efficient and clever and top up me bonuses for the most decent nicks.
Wednesday, April 26, 2006
Tuesday, April 25, 2006
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